Hagen, age 10

Nikola, age 5

—————

Hagen’s P.O.V

“Josey, please,” I beg on a near whine while I watch her scramble to squeeze yet another shirt into her overnight bag.

She spares me a glance, but there isn’t any pity or guilt on her face, only disgust as she wrinkles her nose. “The begging is already a lot. Whining doesn’t suit you, Hagen. Stop it.”

I let the pout I’d been about to pull out of my arsenal fall at that. Shit like that never worked on Josey, even less when it was coming from me.

“It’s just one night,” she reminds me like a tired teacher. “Aren’t you looking forward to a night on your own?”

“No,” I deadpan, making her chuckle a little.

“While it is super adorable that you’re so attached to me, your big sister-”

“It was a c-section— who came first was by chance,” I interject.

“It’s about time that you learned to stand on your own two feet,” she continues with wilful ignorance and a smile I’m sure she meant to be sweet. I’m sure in some parallel universe, it was. “I can’t always be here to look after you, little brother.”

“Okay, why don’t we bring this,” I circle my hand to reference her entire vicinity, “down to a manageable, floor level. I’m not hounding after you, I just don’t want to sleep alone.”

“You’re ten, Hagen,” Josey reminds me as if I didn’t know that already.

It should’ve been embarrassing– the way I couldn’t sleep alone– but honestly, I didn’t feel any sort of shame.

So I liked having someone else around while I was at my most vulnerable, to me, that sounded like something everyone should want. If anything, everyone else should be embarrassed that they lacked my heightened sense of self-preservation.

“You’ll be fine, Hagen,” Josey says while she scans over the catastrophe she called a bed. “Where the hell is my phone?”

I look at the phone that had slid down her comforter earlier and now hid under her bed, and I keep my mouth shut.

I didn’t care if it was mean, I wasn’t helping her find her way out of this place in any way.

Folding my legs under me, I rest my face in my hands as I look at my sister, “I blame this on you.”

“The fuck?” Josey questions as she flings an offended frown my way.

I nod my head seriously. “If you didn’t insist on following me to the land of the living, I would’ve been born on my own and gotten used to sleeping on my own as a pup.”

“Oh my Goddess.”

“Instead, I’ve shared everything with you since birth. Now, I’ve got separation anxiety,” I accuse while I stare at her. “This is literally, all your fault.”

Josey closes her eyes and takes a deep breath before she turns back to her overflowing bag. “I’m just going to ignore you and let you wallow in your self-pity because I know this is hard for you, okay?”

That was a pretty good deal considering Josey could literally cut me to threads with her words if she wanted to.

“Okay,” I agree begrudgingly. “… but do youreallyhave to go?”

“Oh my Goddess, Hagen, please!” Josey shouts, releasing her frustration in one big huff.

“Okay, fine,” I say, raising my hands. “Are you excited about your first sleepover then?”

Josey immediately brightens as she forcefully shoves her little case of toiletries down the corner of her bag. “I actually am. Nia and Beck are the first girls I’ve met who don’t piss me off with every breath, and, bonus points, they aren’t overly sensitive to everything I say.”

“Oh shit, really?” I ask, having a hard time wrapping my head around that part.

“Really,” Josey confirms with an excited nod.

As much as I didn’t want Josey to go tonight, I couldn’t help but be a little happy for her.

Josey didn’t really have… friends.

Most times in school, she hung out with me and my friends, who liked her too, but she didn’t really have herownfriends. It was because of her mouth. Josey had never learned how to be sickly sweet or smartly quiet during those situations where you should be.

It wasn’t a bad thing. If you wanted the truth, you’d always find it in Josey. She didn’t know how to lie to someone’s face, even if all they wanted to hear was a lie.

With her, you always got the truth, and that was a great thing.

But among the prissy girls in our middle school, it was the worst possible thing. They wanted to be gassed up with pretty lies and empty words— Josey’s harsh truths were the last thing they wanted.

So Josey was mostly friendless, and then she met Nia and Beck, the two girls who seemed just as aware of the real world as Josey.

The three of them had grown as thick as thieves and now, they were having their first sleepover which was also Josey’s first sleepover ever.

Josey didn’t like those types of things usually, but with Winter and Beck, she’d been looking forward to nothing else all week.

My heart pinches a little with guilt as my inner voice makes itself present. With a sigh, I get up and pick up Josey’s phone from the floor.

Josey stares at it as I hold it for her before her eyes raise to mine and soften, “Thanks, Hagen.”

Nodding, I pat her back and help her collect the few remaining things I knew she couldn’t survive a night without; her charger, her face wash, and her stress ball.

“Josey,” Dad calls from downstairs, his impatience obvious. “We should’ve been out the door ten minutes ago!”

“Coming!” Josey screeches back like the t-rex she really was.

Looking at me, Josey smiles a little, her nervousness clear as day. “It’s going to be fine,” I promise.

“Unless they’re secretly bitches and they try something while I sleep,” she rushes out with an anxious chuckle.

I shrug, “If they do, shave their heads and we’ll make their lives hell in school.”

Josey perks up at that but her eyes still hold the worry she was usually careful of showing to others. “You going to be okay without me?”

“I’m not going to like it, but yeah,” I say reluctantly. “Worst case, I’ll spend the night binging something.”

When Josey doesn’t nod, I give her a shove and grab her bag, “Come on, you’ll be late.”

Josey rushes to follow after me, wrestling her bag out of my grasp as we make our way downstairs to where Dad and Pops waited patiently.

The second Josey’s in reach, Pops pulls her into a hug before he holds her face, “Remember the safety rules.”

“Don’t leave the house, no shifting, no wolf stuff, but all that goes out the window if someone tries to come in the room—” Josey repeats like a robot, “I know, Dad.”

Nodding, Pops ruffles her hair a bit before giving her a shove forward to Dad who waits with a smile, “You’re going to have so much fun.”

I was pretty sure some part of Dad had always dreamed of taking Josey to her first sleepover, though he probably thought it would’ve happened when she was six, not ten.

Instead of fighting Dad’s excitement, Josey beams up at him and nods, basically making Dad combust from the inside.

“You have everything?” He checks while he passes his fingers through her hair, his own trailing freely down his shoulders.

“I triple-checked,” Josey lies making Dad chuckle while Pops glares at her as if she’d offended him.

Boys, your sister’s leaving for her first sleepover– Dad says through the family link as he takes hold of Josey despite her protests.

Have fun, and call if you need anything handled –Damon says lazily from his side.

You’re going to have the best time ever! Enjoy every moment of it– Levi adds kindly.

Peter’s rushed steps fill the house as he makes his way down to say his part in person instead of through the link.

“Ca-Call, if you… you need anything or… or you get n-nervous and f-feel unsure about any… anything.”

Josey nods, smiling up at Peter with a love I felt in every corner of my soul.

When Peter lets Josey go, he comes to my side and rests a hand on my shoulder while Josey and Dad leave. She sends a wink over her shoulder with a small smile, “You’re going to be fine.”

“I know. A night without your nasty breath will be amazing!” I shout back and for once, Josey lets me have it, only laughing on her way out.

The door shuts behind them, leaving Pops, Peter and me standing awkwardly before Pops claps his hands together and raises both brows, “Lunch?”

I nod and Peter comes without a word, staying close to me even when he didn’t have to.

Sometimes Peter just knew. More than anyone else in the family, Peter always knew what to do and what each person needed in every moment, especially when it came to Josey and me.

A lot of people thought that Josey and I were closest to Levi, and while we loved him and Damon too, it was Peter who used to deal with us when we were kids. That attachment never left, and if Peter asked me to do anything, I could never say no.

Pops had said lunch but for some reason, five minutes later, we all had bowls of ice cream and apple crumble in front of us. Not that I was complaining. I’d scored a massive slice that had to be savoured with slow, meaningful bites.

“So, how are you feeling about sleeping on your own tonight?” Pops asks not nearly as casually as he was trying to be.

Suddenly, the big slice made a lot more sense.

“I’m fine,” I reply with a shrug. “I get the room to myself tonight— score.”

“You could have a room to yourself every night,” Pops reminds me with eyes that were a little too knowing, “and yet, you and Josey insist on sharing one room.”

I don’t reply.

It wasn’t my fault I couldn’t sleep on my own. It was actually Josey’s fault, as we’d established earlier. Her fault and Pops and Dad’s, too. They were the ones who put us in the same room when we were pups.

“You… You can sleep w-w-with me to-tonight,” Peter offers with a sweet smile and I swear to Goddess I almost fall to his feet to kiss them. It wouldn’t be the same as being with Josey but Peter was a notorious cuddler, so it would be great in its own way.

But before I could give my obvious ‘yes’, Pops cuts in, “I don’t think that’s a good idea.”

Both Peter and I turn to him with a frown.

“I think this might be a good chance for you to get used to sleeping on your own, Hagen,” Pops continues carefully, his tone soft, which was weird as hell. “It won’t be any day soon, but one day, you and Josey might go separate ways, or you might want to live on your own. It’ll be harder trying to do that when you’re older than it would be now.”

“Why would Josey and I ever go separate ways?” I question as my brows draw together and I tilt my head.

Josey may be an honest-to-Goddess pain in my ass, and a bitch at the best of times, but she was still my best friend and all the other mushy stuff. We’d been together since the day we were born—before that if you really thought about it— and we’d be together until the day we died. That was obvious.

Dad stares at me with a worried expression that seems to be made of nothing but confusion and pity— two things I didn’t get when I’d only stated what we all knew.

I look at Peter and my eyes widen a little when I find him sporting the same pitiful look.

“Who died?” I ask as I look between them.

“Hagen…” Pops starts softly.

That was even weirder. “You guys are acting weird.”

“Hagen,” Pops says again, “youdoknow that as you get older, you might want some things that Josey doesn’t, or she might want to do certain things you have no interest in, right?”

I roll my eyes. “Obviously,” I reply with a chuckle. “I’ll just go with her when she’s doing something like that, and she’ll do the same for me.”

Peter and Pops exchange a quick look.

“Did Jo-Josey say s-she wanted to do… do that?” Peter asks, his eyes deceptively kind, but then again Peter could never be deceptive about anything.

“No, but why would we separate?” I reply, not understanding what they were trying to say. “We’re always together.”

Coming around the kitchen island to slip into the free stool on my right, Pops twists me to face him and pins me with those serious eyes. “Hagen, you might always be together now, but what you need to understand is that sometimes, when people grow older, they separate. And one day, you and Josey may do the same.”

“For more sleepovers?” I question, stumped because I didn’t see Josey still doing the sleepover thing when she was Pops’ age.

“You know how she’s been talking about going to the academy lately?” He prompts instead and I nod. “Do you want to go to the academy, too?”

I snort, “No, never. But I’d go with Josey if she got in.”

“That’s the thing, the academy isn’t something you can just tag along for,” Pops continues quickly. “If Josey gets in and you don’t, you guys will be separated for a long time.”

I falter at that, my mind coming up short with an answer to the problem I didn’t know even existed until now.

In my head, Josey and I would go together, anywhere. It was what we’d always done and it was what we’d always do. But then, if I didn’t get into the academy, would Josey go without me?

I wanted to say ‘no, she’d never do that’… But then Josey had been talking a lot about the academy recently, and she was even arranging extra training classes with Dad outside the pack to make her more ‘attractive for applications’.

It wasn’t like one of those things she loved for five seconds and then dropped, she seemed to really want to do this.

I told myself she wouldn’t go without me, but then again, she’d gone to this sleepover tonight, something she really wanted… so wouldn’t she do the same for the academy too?

My shoulders slump and a thick cloud of sadness suddenly forms around my heart, clouding my chest so quickly that it was a little hard to breathe.

I stare at the little bit of crumble left and the scoop of ice cream melting on top of it. I watch the way the once-solid crumble became soggy and broke down under the melting ice cream, even though it was fine before.

I push the sad plate away and hurry out of my seat, “I’m going to take a walk.”

“I-I’ll come with you,” Peter offers, already on his feet within the same breath but I shake my head.

“I just want to go alone.”

Peter tries to fight me but stops when Pops takes hold of his wrist and shakes his head. He then offers me a small smile and nods, “You can, once you promise to come and find me when you’re back.”

I didn’t want to do that. Pops would make me talk about my feelings and he wouldn’t let me go until he was sure I was okay, but if I said no, he’d make me do that now and with Peter.

This was an out, and I wasn’t dumb enough to not take it.

I nod, agreeing to the condition before my thoughts can weigh me down completely.

Without Peter on my tail, I make a beeline for the front door and get my bike from the place I’d left it just behind the house.

Times like this, I really wish I could shift and just run out with my wolf to escape all the things that made me feel like breathing was hard. But I still had another year before I’d meet my wolf and be able to shift.

While other people were excited about the shifting, I really just wanted to meet my wolf.

I never really felt lonely, but I was sure moments like today would be a lot easier to deal with when you weren’t facing it alone.

Shifting the pressure against my heart to my feet, I pedal my way down the driveway and force myself to go as fast as I can manage to escape my new reality.

It wasn’t just one night like tonight. One day, Josey would want to do something that didn’t involve me and I’d have to fend for myself.

I go faster, not knowing or caring where I was going. I keep pedalling until the pack’s gravel roads turn to dirt paths that are just fine until rain begins to fall.

“Like today didn’t suck enough,” I grumble angrily as the rain begins to fall in light spatters.

I stop my bike and glance back.

I was almost on the other side of the pack now so if I turned around, I was basically ensured a fifteen-minute ride back in the cold. But if I kept going forward, I’d be at the Amorenia’s house in less than five minutes.

Aunty Kat would be surprised to see me and she’d probably make a comment about having a wet mutt on her doorstep, but she’d take me in, dry me with magic and teleport me home.

I carry on ahead.

Within seconds, the light sprinkles became a full-on shower that came with the kind of aggression that made me think I’d personally offended some cloud. The dirt roads are harder to cycle through when they are turned to mud, and the weight of my soaked clothing slows me down.

When I spot the familiar white pillars and dark blue walls, I can’t help but release a sigh of relief as I jump off my bike and run the rest of the way with it at my side. Dropping it on the grass, I bolt up the steps and head for safety under the covered porch.

I swipe at the strands of my hair that had glued themselves to my forehead, trying to simultaneously dry my face and catch my breath before I knocked on the door.

In all honesty, I’d forgotten that one and a half werewolves lived in the Amorenia household so when the old brown door opens without warning, I jumped back with a small shriek.

Uncle Apollos blinks at me, a small smile pulling on his lips while he holds the door open. “I’m sorry, did I disturb a private moment here?”

It was impossible not to feel a little more relaxed around someone like Uncle Apollos whose personality traits were completely centred around relaxed and humoured.

“Maybe,” I reply with a weak smile. “I got caught in the rain and your house was the closest.”

Opening the door and making room for me to step inside, he waves me in, “Come on, we’ll get you freshened up.”

“You don’t have to,” I say even as I step inside to escape the icy cold. “I was just hoping Aunty Kat could dry me off and zap me home. I won’t stay for long.”

Uncle Apollos winces as he shuts the door and pushes me into the house. “Unfortunately for you, Kat’s out right now, so the only option you have is to take a warm shower while I try to find something that can fit you.”

I try to shake my head. I didn’t need a whole shower, but he wasn’t taking no for an answer, and my fusses were quickly ignored.

A towel shoved into my hands is all I get before the bathroom door upstairs is shut behind me, leaving me in a situation I did not plan for.

Maybe I should’ve just forced my way home instead.

There wasn’t anything wrong with the Amorenias’ shower or the house, or Uncle Apollos. I just felt guilty whenever I disturbed people and put them out of their way, and that was exactly what I was doing here.

With a sigh, I tug off the drenched top stuck to my torso before twisting out of my pants and underwear for the quickest shower ever known to man. It was tempting to stay in the hot water for a few minutes longer, but there was no need, and I wasn’t going to be a dick and hog someone else’s hot water.

My name wasn’t Levi.

When I’m all done, I find a pile of clean clothes waiting for me just outside the bathroom door and shout a ‘thank you’ to Uncle Apollos before I quickly change into them.

Within minutes, I was dry, in fresh clothes, and warm.

I smile as I step out with my soggy clothes in a bag, tiptoeing through the quiet house in search of the werewolf who had welcomed me.

“In the kitchen!”

I follow the voice through the maze of the house and receive a warm smile from the owner when he spots me.

“I thought some hot chocolate might be nice,” he says gesturing to the cup he was handling.

“Thanks,” I say after I swallow a grateful moan.

Settling myself at the small breakfast table beside the large kitchen windows, I look around and listen out for my favourite hybrid who normally would’ve found himself attached to my hip by now.

“Nik’s with Katerina,” Uncle Apollos answers before I can ask.

My skin flushes and I offer him a little smile as he comes over to the table with two large mugs in hand.

“Don’t worry,” he says kindly, “Nik’s just as attached to you as you are to him.”

“He’s a sweet kid,” I reply while I circle my hands around the steaming cup.

“He’ll probably stop speaking to Katerina for a day or two when he gets back and finds out you were here,” Uncle Apollos teases and my smile widens because that probably wasn’t even an exaggeration.

Nikola was my favourite person. We were friends and had been for years now. I always knew we would be when he’d always favoured me over anyone else in the family since the day we first met him, and that was something I always bragged about.

It was only recently that Nik had started speaking, and he still really wasn’t one for words, but that never stopped pouring out of him when he saw me and tried to catch me up on everything that had happened since the last time I saw him.

It was adorable and nice, too, having someone like you so much, even if Nikola was just a kid. But Nikola would probably grow out of it, his attachment to me. Like Pops said earlier, people grew up and went their separate ways.

“So, how did you find yourself this far from home?” Uncle Apollos asks curiously, his eyes doing that parental thing adults do sometimes.

“No clue,” I reply a little too fast. He raises a brow and I sigh, “Josey’s gone for a sleepover, and I was bored, so I went for a ride around the pack.”

That wasn’t exactly how things went, but it was close enough.

Uncle Apollos nods and palms his mug the same way I do.“And the rain caught you while you were out?”

“Yeah,” I reply quietly and he nods again. “I’ll leave the second it stops, don’t worry.”

“Don’t be silly, Hagen. You can stay as long as you want, and if you want to skip the journey back, you can wait until Kat’s back so she can take you.”

That was a tempting offer, and even as I opened my mouth to say it was fine, my body wouldn’t let the words out.

“And I’m sure Nikola would love to see you too,” he adds, hammering the last nail in.

I sink into my chair with a sigh as I bring the cup to my chest. “Okay, thank you. I really appreciate you letting me stay.”

“You’re family, kid,“ Uncle Apollos assures me with that massive smile that everyone in the pack loved. “We can relax for a bit then I’ll start on dinner. If you want to help, you can, if not, the TV will be free.”

“I’ll help,” I say immediately. I hated cooking but I loved living, and I wouldn’t be if Dad found out I sat around and watched TV while someone else cooked dinner.

Dead. I’d be dead.

“I’ll call your old man and let him know you’re here then. We don’t want him running around in the rain looking for you.”

I blush again with embarrassment and distract myself with my hot chocolate while Uncle Apollos calls up Pops. The conversation between them was a quick one with some shared laughter and promises that Uncle Apollos would make sure I made it back home and safe.

Hanging up, Uncle Apollos fixes me with a look, “Your dad sounded worried about you.”

I try to hide in the chair, but there was nowhere to go.

“Is everything okay, Hagen?”

It was impossible to lie to a werewolf. We could literally hear when you did, and I had yet to conquer the rare skill of keeping my heart steady when I did.

“Kind of,” I reply with a shrug, keeping my eyes pointedly at the table. “I just realised something a bit sad today.”

Humming like he understood exactly what I meant, Uncle Apollos taps his fingers against the table. “If you want to talk about it, we can. But if you want to tell me what’s going on in school instead, that’s cool too.”

“School’s horrible,” I blurt out, beyond grateful for the second option.

Leaning back into his seat, Uncle Apollos smiles, “What’s trying to kill you? English?”

“Math,” I reply and he winces. “Yeah, my brain doesn’t have enough space for it.”

“What are they forcing you to learn now?”

I doubt Uncle Apollos really wanted to hear about middle school math, but he listened to every word I said and didn’t once push me to talk about what happened earlier.

We talk for what feels like forever until we both finish our hot chocolate and move to the kitchen to start on dinner. As promised, I stand ready to help and he starts me off with washing the vegetables for the roast he was preparing for tonight.

He tells me about how hard school had been for him too, how much he’d hated learning things at a desk and how nothing ever stuck. Then he tells me the story of how he became a pack warrior, and how he learnt far more out there than he ever did in any school.

Uncle Apollos could speak like a hundred languages, and on his trips, he’d met all sorts of creatures and had some of the most amazing stories I’d ever heard.

Before he met Aunty Kat, he’d gone on a mission where he’d met a troll!

Yesterday, Uncle Apollos was one of my dads’ friends who was super chill about literally everything. Today, he was the coolest person I’d ever met in my entire life.

How did he not tell everyone he met that he met and spoke to a troll! That was insane!!!!

“You can do this part,” he says, stepping aside so that I could season the meat and then the chopped and boiled potatoes before they went into the preheated oven. “They’re already buttered up, so now you just have to make sure they’re tasty when they come out.”

“What makes it tasty?” I ask as I watch the mountains of packets and little bottles of powders and herbs.

“You can never go wrong with rosemary,” Uncle says, passing a little glass bottle to me.

Following his instructions, I season the potatoes and lick my lips a hundred times over as the meal slowly starts to pull itself together before my eyes. My stomach grumbles for the meal I wasn’t even going to have, but it was fun enough hanging out with Uncle Apollos.

When the potatoes go in, Uncle raises a hand for me with a grin on his face. I jump to smack it before I return his grin at full force.

We get to cleaning up while the last of the meal is prepared and Uncle indulges me and tells me even more about the troll who had been taller than any other living thing he met.

My bucket list was pretty short, so it wasn’t hard to add ‘meet a troll’ to the top of it.

We’ve just finished cleaning when the swirling heat of magic fills the house and Aunty Kat and Nikola appear hand in hand in the doorway between the kitchen and the hallway.

Both their eyes widen when they spot me, but while Aunty Kat frowned with confusion, Nikola’s face lit up all at once as he came running straight over to me.

“Hagen!”

I smile automatically and feel my insides light up in the way they always did whenever Nikola was near, and lower myself enough to meet his oncoming hug.

Nikola was selectively very affectionate with me, but only me, and I didn’t mind that since his hugs were awesome.

“What are you doing here?” He asks with a little gasp when he pulls back as if he can’t believe it was me.

I chuckle as I rest a hand on his head, “I got caught in the rain so I’m camping out here until it stops.”

Frowning, Nikola looks to the windows. “It’s not raining.”

I follow his gaze and he’s right— there isn’t a raindrop to be found in sight. The rain must’ve stopped while Uncle Apollos and I were cooking and I hadn’t even noticed.

“I guess it’s not,” I reply with a small laugh as I look up to Aunty Kat who was wrapped around her mate now. “I should head home.”

“No!” Nikola snaps as he tangles his fingers between mine and clings to me. “I just got back, you can’t leave already.”

“I know it sucks, but I have to get home,” I say, forcing myself to smile for him but Nikola doesn’t return it.

Instead, his grey eyes fill with worry as they dart between mine, growing more and more miserable in a way that made my heart feel like it was bleeding all over itself. Then little splatters of rain start again outside, temporarily claiming my attention as I watch the rain come back.

“No need to play with the weather, Nikki,” Aunty Kat says as her eyes glow and the rain stops. “How about you stay for dinner Hagen?”

I look between them all, feeling unsure. “I’m supposed to go home when it stops raining.

The rain tries to start up again and Aunty Kat frowns at Nik before she disappears suddenly.

“Is she—” My words are cut off when she reappears with the scent of Pops lingering on her a little.

“Aiden says it’s fine, so you can stay for dinner if you want.”

“Please, Hagen,” Nikola begs while his fingers dip firmly into mine.

I couldn’t deny Nikola a thing. I physically couldn’t, so I nod and smile for him, this time for real, “Okay, okay, I’ll stay.”

The house shakes just a little as he clutches my waist in another unexpected hug. I glance back at his parents who mouth a‘thank you’over their smiles.

With Nikola here, I didn’t stand a chance of talking to anyone else, which was great because I didn’t want to. Nik pulls me away from the kitchen and to the living room to sit with him while he asks me about my day, but I that’s the last thing I want to do, so I convince him to tell me about his first.

Apparently, Aunty Kat had taken him to some ancient witch lands for him to learn about earth magic, and even though he wasn’t an earth warlock, he thought that he’d felt something when he touched the ground.

I listened to him speak with wrapped attention, because when Nikola was so excited to talk to me, I was just as excited to listen.

Nikola’s kneeling at my side on the couch with his hands covering mine and talking about his heritage when he stops talking to look at me. It’s a very sudden stop, so abrupt that my heart stops too.

Nik barely breathes while he studies me in the way he did with other people when he watched them sometimes.

He tilts his head and pouts just a little, “You’re sad.”

It was a statement, not a question.

I laugh just a little, “No I’m not.”

“You are,” Nikola argues, his grey eyes stuck on mine. “I’m sorry I didn’t notice before.”

He sounded genuinely sad about that and as he gives my hand a little squeeze, my heart does the same, feeling both pained and overjoyed at the same time.

It was hard enough to lie to a werewolf, lying to a hybrid was impossible.

“It’s nothing to worry about,” I promise, because I wasn’t going to spill my guts to a five-year-old, no matter how smart Nikola was.

Nikola’s frown deepens and his grey eyes harden as he draws himself even closer to my side, “I worry.”

“Nikola, it’s fine.” It wasn’t and even as I said it, I knew he could hear it.

“You won’t understand,” I say with a sigh as I sink back into the couch that feels more comfortable than my bed.

“I will,” Nikola argues angrily.

My heart wilts, and it takes effort not to just spill it all out.

“Are you lonely?” He tries and I shake my head. “Angry?” I shake my head again. “Do you need a hug?”

I…

I stay still, not sure how to shake my head at such an innocent but invasive question.

When no answer comes from me, Nikola climbs into my lap and forces a hug onto me. Though ‘force’ was a strong word to describe the tiny arms that wrapped around my neck, hugging me gently with a carefulness that made me feel like I might break.

It was so kind, so sweet and gentle that I swore a part of me did break just a little.

Without a word, I hug him back. Needing this small comfort no matter who it came from, but it only felt better that it was coming from someone as nice as Nikola.

“When you’re sad or need a hug, I’ll always give you a hug,” Nikola promises against my neck.

“Always?” I question. I was trying to tease, but a part of me was desperate for it to be true.

“Always,” Nikola confirms firmly.

I had to laugh. Because a five-year-old had just promised to hug me whenever I was sad and for some reason, there wasn’t a bone in my body that doubted that it was true.

I’d realised that today that my twin, the person I was closest to in this world, might go on to live a life without me, but when Nikola said he’d always give me hugs, my heart didn’t doubt it for a moment.

Wasn’t that twisted?

When Nikola pulls back, he smiles brightly at me and even Goddess herself can’t stop me from smiling back.

At dinner, Nikola sits beside me, and Aunty Kat and Uncle Nik opposite us. We speak about all sorts of things, but I stayed mostly quiet since I didn’t want to impose on their family meal. That, and it was hard to carry a conversation when I was stuffing my mouth with food I couldn’t believe I helped make.

Throughout the meal, Nikola tried his best to ask me all sorts of things no matter how often I reminded him that not everyone at the table wanted to know if my favourite colour had changed since March.

Dinner with the Amorenias was different from dinner at home. They were relaxed with their displays of affection were the polar opposite of the screaming matches I was used to with my family, and I found that I loved them both in their own ways.

“I guess it’s time to take you home,” Aunty Kat says once the plates are cleared and we are all full. Nikola frowns again but doesn’t try begging me to stay, which is surprising.

“Wait here,” he says instead before he dashes out of the room.

I turn to Aunty Kat who just shrugs while she pats her full stomach and stretches.

Nikola returns only a minute later, carrying the penguin plushie I’d gotten him for his birthday last year.

He shoves it into my hands with a smile, “Take this with you.”

“What? Why?” I question with wide eyes. “Do you not like it?”

For some reason, the thought made pain spark throughout my body. I’d looked hard and long for the perfect gift for Nikola last year, and the second I spotted the Emperor Penguin Stuffie, I knew I’d hit the jackpot.

It was Nikola’s favourite penguin, and I swear the kid almost teleported the whole pack to Siberia with his excitement when I’d given it to him. I’d never seen Nikola so happy in my life, and to think he didn’t like it any more was… painful.

“No!” Nikola says quickly, his eyes growing wide with alarm. “I love it. But I want you to have it.”

“I don’t get it.”

Nikola sighs before he looks at his parents as if they were intruders. He grabs my wrist and forces me to follow him to a quiet corner of the house as if Aunty Kat’s magic couldn’t follow us there.

I bend down to his level and listen in close as he whispers, “When you’re sad or lonely and I’m not there to give you a hug, give this a hug instead.” He raises the plushie in my hands, “Imagine it’s me you’re hugging and you’ll feel all better.”

My heart splinters into pieces in my chest as I look at the adorable kid who is way too kind for his own good.

“No, Nikola, this was a gift to you,” I start but he shakes his head.

“You can give it back to me when I can give you the hugs anytime,” Nikola says simply. “I can’t control my magic yet. But one day when I can, I’ll hug you whenever you want, and you can give me this back.”

I stare down at the innocent plushie, wanting it to speak up and do the right thing I clearly wasn’t strong enough to do myself.

“Alright little Calderon Mutt, I’ve got to get you home now,” Aunty Kat says, interrupting before I could figure this out. “Nikola, say bye.”

Giving me another hug, Nikola holds on a little longer before he pulls back and disappears into his house before I can give him the toy back. I hold it awkwardly in my hands as I stand up and look at Aunt Katy.

“If you think for a second that you can leave that behind and make me deal with a Sad Nikola, you’re dead wrong, kid.”

I sigh and nod, holding onto the plushie as Aunty Kat takes grips my shoulder and takes me home.

While she catches up with Pops and Dad who is back now, I say my thanks and make my way up the stairs and to my room. The house wasn’t quiet— I could hear Damon screaming at his console from here and Levi’s music was pretty loud— but it still felt empty in a weird way.

It was because I usually had Josey by my side when we locked ourselves away in our room. But tonight, I was alone as I opened my door and switched on the lights.

Dragging myself over to my bed, I grab my phone and check for any texts.

Evil Twin: It’s going great! Try not to cry yourself to sleep

Me: Don’t forget to brush your teeth gremlin.

Evil Twin: ❤️

Switching off my phone, I head to the bathroom to brush my teeth and get ready for bed. It wasn’t that late, and it was a Saturday, but I was already tired and I didn’t feel like staying up.

When I’m just about to climb into bed, a knock comes on the door.

“Come in,” I call as I flip my sheets back.

Pops pokes his head in, his black eyes finding me in an instant, “Going to bed already, kid?”

“Figured I should bite the bullet,” I reply dryly as I slide in.

Pops winces a little before he lets the rest of his body in and comes over. Sinking onto the edge of the bed, he pats my leg a little. “I’m sorry if I was rough about things earlier. I just wanted to give you…” he searches for the right word, “realistic expectations.”

“That I’ll be alone when I’m older?”

He winces again. “Yeah, I didn’t explain things in the best way, and I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to upset you.”

I relax against my pillows, “It’s okay, Dad. I think I was kind of ignoring the obvious for a long time.”

“It’s notthe obvious,” he argues quickly. “For all we know, you and Josey might get a two-bedroom place and live together until you’re grey and wrinkly. Lots of twins and siblings do that, and there’s nothing to say you won’t.”

We both knew Josey wasn’t that type of twin, but neither of us actually said it.

“And even if you don’t,” he continues slowly, “you’ll meet people, fall in love, have kids, and you’llalwayshave us. You’re not going to be alone Hagen. I should’ve said that earlier and I’m sorry I didn’t.”

“It’s okay,” I say, and I mean it. “I’m okay Dad.”

Pops frowns a little. “I can stay with you tonight,” he offers almost excitedly. “We can order pizza and stay up all night watching Star Wars.

“Star Wars?”

He shrugs, “It was the first thing I thought of.”

“I don’t like Star Wars,” my frown deepens. “I’ve never even seen a single-”

“I just said it was the first thing that popped into my head!”

Shaking my head, I chuckle a little, “Well, I don’t want to watch Star Wars, old man. I’m actually tired and I’m ready to sleep.”

“If you’re sure,” Pops says as he rises to his feet and I nod. “Alright, just get me or your dad if you change your mind, even if it’s 1 am when you do.”

“You would literally try to kill me if I did that,” I argue, but Pops just mocks me childishly while he tosses my sheets over me and tucks me in roughly.

Once I’m settled and left with nothing to do but stare up at him, Pops cracks a smile and leans forward to press a kiss to my temple, “Good night, Hagen.”

“Night Dad,” I reply with a yawn.

Pops makes sure to switch off the light on his way out, sparing me one last smile before he shuts the door behind him and locks me away in the darkness.

Slowly, my eyes adjust enough for me to glance across at the empty bed that usually had a lump under the comforters and the sound of soft breaths.

I turn on my side and cast my gaze to the wall instead as I reach over for the penguin Nikola had left me with. While I try to hide under the sheets, I wrap my arms around the large penguin and hug it tight, holding it with the same care Nikola had shown me earlier.

My heart warms at the memory and I smile into my pillow.

People weren’t like Nikola, just nice and thoughtful. And while I knew that Nikola wasn’t like that with other people— actually, quite the opposite— it was nice to have someone be like that with me.

Somehow, even as young as he was, Nikola made it seem like every promise he ever made was an eternal one, and I really believed him.

He would be right there if I was ever alone, or sad, and he’d keep me company with his hugs.

And in the meantime, I had a penguin to do the job.

I just… I just had to be patient… and maybe one day… maybe one day I wouldn’t be alone.

—————–

Nikola has alwayssssss been there for this boy omg

Thoughts???????????

Thoughts on the reality check??? On finally getting a glimpse of the relationship Hagen had with Apollos and Kat????? On little, sweet Nik??????

This is an extra that was written on Patreon years ago and I knew would come into the book. I shortened it a bit and changed a few details, so if you’d want to read the full, original thing, follow the link in my bio to my Patreon page.

If this memory scene feels random, I promise it will make more sense with what happens next chapter – which I’ve already finished writing and will have out some time next week!!!

As always, if you enjoyed this chapter be sure to comment and vote it up!!! I’m looking forward to the next chapter, and I hope you all are too!!!

Until next time,
Byeeeeeeeee Humansssssssssss