MERRY CHRISTMAS AND HAPPY HOLIDAYS HUMANS!!!!!!!!!!!!

AS MY GIFT TO YOU ALL FOR BEING SO WONDERFUL THIS YEAR, HERE IS A VERY SPECIAL PACKAGE!

FOR EVERYONE:

– 3 CHAPTERS OF AIASTHLYN

– A COUPLE Q&A WITH NIKOLA AND HAGEN

FOR SUBSCRIBERS ON PATREON AND MY WEBSITE:

+ THE FINAL 4 CHAPTERS OF VIRION

+ MAX AND RUBEN GO ON A DATE

ENJOY AND PLEASE REMEMBER TO COMMENT!!!!!!!!!!!!

———————

Hagen: “Between Jacob and me, who was the better best friend?”

Nikola: *does not breathe*

HAGEN CALDERON-HEIL AMORENIA AND NIKOLA HEIL-CALDERON AMORENIA TELL THE TRUTH

Presented by Tippy

Tippy: Hagen

Hagen: Yeah.

Tippy: Nikola

Nikola: Yes.

Tippy: We brought you here today to take a lie detector test. One of you will be hooked up to the machine, while the other will ask the questions. And then you’ll switch.

Nikola: *nods in acceptance*

Hagen: *already sweating*

Tippy: I will be your polygraph operator, even though I have absolutely no training or experience with this. I just created your minds and everything about you, so that works too.

Hagen: You did wha–

Tippy: Who wants to be in the hot seat first?

Hagen: ME! *raises hand and shakes it around* I want to get it over with.

Nikola: *looks to camera* Hagen doesn’t like it when his fear builds up 

HAGEN IS HOOKED UP TO THE MACHINE

Hagen: Oh fuck, I’m already sweating

Tippy: It’s okay. The machine is really just there for decoration and to make you nervous.

Hagen: You are literally the worst author ever.

Tippy: I gave you Nikola, didn’t I?

Hagen: … you win this round.

Nikola: You said I have to read the questions, but this is a script.

Tippy: Yeah, I’m trying to stay close to the source material and hoping Vaniety Fair doesn’t sue me. Just read it.

Nikola: *big sigh as he holds up his papers* I am going to ask you some questions to calibrate the machine. A machine that doesn’t work anyway—

Tippy: I could do without the sass

Nikola: *ignores, looking only at Hagen* Is your full name Hagen Sol Calderon-Heil Amorenia?

Hagen: *grinning* Yes, that last name is a recent adjustment

Nikola: *hums, pleased* Are you about to take a polygraph test?

Hagen: *sweating again* Yes

Nikola: Are you nervous?

Hagen: Yes

Nikola: … I think I’m going to enjoy this.

HAGEN CALDERON-HEIL AMORENIA TELLS THE TRUTH

Nikola: As a child, you said you would never ever ever be with Nikola, now you ride him three nights a week. How do you feel about how wrong you were?

Tippy: Jesus

Hagen: What the fuck? Aren’t you supposed to ease me into these? 

Nikola: I’m just reading the script

Tippy: Well actually, it’s a list of questions and you can choose any to start from but—

Nikola: Answer the question, Hagen.

Hagen: I mean… *shifts uncomfortably* I’m okay with it, clearly. I mean, I never saw it coming and I think younger me would have a panic attack if they knew… that, but I’m happy with how things turned out. I love Nik.

Tippy: *watches lines squiggle on paper* he’s telling the truth

Hagen: Duh. Okay, hit me with the next one. I’m ready.

Nikola: Which of my friends is your favourite?

Hagen: Jacob, come on. I’ve known him forever. *Grins and relaxes* I thought these were going to be scary. 

Nikola: *raises a brow*  What is something that I do that you hate but haven’t told me?

Tippy: Oh fuck.

Hagen: *face drops*

Tippy: That last part wasn’t even—

Nikola: Hagen?

Hagen: There’s nothing that I haven’t told you. I mean we’re really open now, so I’ve shared it all.

*Nikola looks to Tippy*

*Tippy looks at the machine*

Tippy: Deceptive.

Hagen: Fuck!

Nikola: That is not an answer.

Hagen: *groaning* I don’t know–

Tippy: Also deceptive.

Nikola: *eyes narrow* so it’s not even subconscious…

Hagen: Okay. Okay, fine. I… I don’t like it when you get out of bed before I come back from my runs.

Nikola: What?

Hagen: I like to be there when you wake up! And when you’re already being sweet by making me a smoothie or something, I’m not. Okay. It’s small and stupid. It’s not even serious.

Tippy: …deceptive.

Nikola: *GASPS*

Hagen: FUCK! 

Nikola: You made that all up just to not answer?

Hagen: I don’t have to answer truthfully when I’m caught! That’s not part of the deal. In fact, these are supposed to be yes or no questions that answer themselves!

Nikola: Very well. *looks at paper* Do you think Wreck is actually good or do you know he’s a demon that’s actually only good to you?

Tippy: Again… that’s not on the paper…

Hagen: You son of a bitch

Nikola: She’s been called worst things 

*somewhere in the distance, Kat cackles approvingly.

Hagen: I think… *swallows*… I think my cat is a lovely, loyal pet who sometimes gets a little mean. But I don’t think he’s only good to me.

Tippy: I don’t know why you’re even bothering at this point. *looks to Nikola* deceptive.

Hagen: FUCKKKKKKKKKKKKK

Nikola: Next question, do you realise that you have an oral fixation?

Hagen: *slams head onto the table* I’m going to fucking kill myself.

Tippy: I am curious about this one too. Do you know? Has it even been addressed?

Nikola: I made him aware. We spent an entire weekend only using his mouth. He was… incapacitated for the following week.

Tippy: Hot damn.

Hagen: What’s the point of even asking me if you’re just going to answer? 

Nikola: *smirking* We are one in all things. 

Hagen: *glare* just fucking wait until I get to you.

Nikola: Next question, and this is a serious one. Did ending your childhood friendship with Nikola affect you as deeply as it affected him, or did you move on?

Hagen: Oh… no, that really affected me. I mean, Nik was my best friend back then and I felt like I had to separate us to have a chance at saving our friendship and being as we were one day. I never thought it would go on so long, or get as bad as it did. I never thought we wouldn’t be okay again, and then, we weren’t and… 

Hagen: It was hard, okay. Really fucking hard and maybe you didn’t see it, but I didn’t just move on.

Tippy: He’s telling the truth.

Nikola: *uses magic to console him and Hagen smiles a little* I do not want to do the sad ones.

Tippy: That’s fine. Hand them over here.

Nikola: Wait, that is not what I mean–

Tippy: Hagen. Do you believe you would have been judged less harshly than Nikola if you exhibited the same level of controlling obsession in your youth?

Nikola: *to Hagen* You do not have to answer that

Hagen: It’s okay, Nik. It’s a yes and a no. Yes, because I’m older and it would’ve been a lot different if it were me doing that to a kid, but also no, because I could articulate myself better and that was something Nik couldn’t do back then, and that created a lot of issues.

Nikola: *glares at Tippy*

Tippy: Take it up with them? I’m just here doing my job before Christmas

Nikola: *glares at camera*

Tippy: Don’t worry. That’s it for Hagen. The rest are for you.

Hagen: Fuck yes *rips off cords*

Nikola: *gulps*

NIKOLA HEIL-CALDERON AMORENIA TELLS THE TRUTH

*hooking Nikola up to a brand new machine that is _ friendly*

Hagen: *snickers like a mad scientist while he _ the papers* How are you feeling?

Nikola: Fine. I do not see how this could possibly end badly

Tippy: Oh, you sweet summer child. If only you saw the sneak peek at the start of this.

Nikola: *frowns warily*

Tippy: Alright, Hagen, he’s all yours.

Hagen: Perfect. I don’t even need to calibrate this shit. Lets just go.

Nikola: But that’s not protocol.

Hagen: Fuck protocol. If I asked you to wear a tutu, would you do it?

Tippy: *snorts*

Nikola: Would you be asking seriously or just to make me upset?

Hagen: Does it matter? If I wanted it, would you do it?

Nikola: …yes.

Tippy: Truthful.

Hagen: hehe, I knew it. Okay— would you let me top you?

Nikola: Yes.

Hagen: Do you want me to top you?

Nikola: Not necessarily. I don’t seek that and you would not even be able to do it.

Hagen: *blushing* You don’t know that!

Tippy: Hagen, I’m afraid we all know that. We saw the tapes.

Hagen: *pales* You saw the tapes?!

Tippy: Oh, wait, no. I didn’t mean the sex tapes. I meant like a metaphor. You know what–

*wipes last minute from their minds*

Hagen: Did you ever have a crush on another person growing up? Or even just liked how they looked? 

Nikola: No. It was always Hagen.

Hagen: *grins* What part of my body do you love this most? Wait, why are his questions all nice and mine were grenades?

Tippy: The people love Nikola, bro. I don’t know what to tell you.

Hagen: Love him from afar *looks at camera* or you’re all dead

Nikola: *shifts NOT SUBTLY AT ALL* I do not have a favourite. I love all parts of him.

Tippy: Deceptive.

Hagen: Ooooo

Nikola: No, I’m not. I mean that.

Tippy: I’m sure you think you do, but that’s not the truth.

Hagen: It’s okay. We can move on.

Nikola: No. I need to know. His eyes.

Tippy: Nope

Nikola: His nipples

Hagen: Goddess, can we not—

Tippy: No

Nikola: His nipples, hard

Tippy: Close second, but nope.

Hagen: Why am I suffering?!?! AGAIN!

Nikola: His cock. His hole. His legs when he cums—

Hagen: *bangs head consistently against the wall*

Tippy: Let’s try something more pure, Nikola.

Nikola: *frowns* …his heart?

Tippy: Bingo.

Nikola: Are you sure? 

Hagen: Heyyyy!

Tippy: You like how nice he is to others, and that comes from the heart. That’s your favourite.

Hagen: Well, isn’t that just amazing? Goddess, I love me. Next question though cause you’re having way too much fun at my expense, between Jacob and me, who was the better best friend?

Nikola: *does not breathe*

Hagen: Oh, you’re all quiet now. No. You need to answer it. Who was better, me or him?

Nikola: *looks to Tippy* I do not want to answer this

Tippy: Well, isn’t it a shame that I don’t give a fuck.

Nikola: *glares*

Tippy: *loving life*

Hagen: Tick tock. Answer the clock.

Tippy: Oh… maybe put that pen down, Hagen.

Hagen: JUST ANSWER THE QUESTION

Nikola: I do not know.

Tippy: He’s… being truthful.

Hagen: That is such a cop out! How can you not know

Nikola: You were an amazing friend to me when we were younger. All of my happiest memories come from those times, but Jacob has been amazing too for years, many more years now. When it comes to friendship, I do not know.

Tippy: Awww, that’s so cute.

Hagen: Like hell it is. Next question. Same one I had. What’s something that I do that you hate but haven’t told me?

Nikola: The way you eat.

Hagen: You told me you didn’t mind! That you wanted me to be me!

Nikola: And I meant it… But that does not mean that I like it

Tippy: He is telling the truth.

Hagen: You’re actually the worst. 

Nikola: You do not mean that

Hagen: No, but I want compensation tonight in the form of dick.

Nikola: *snorts* That can be arranged.

Tippy: Reminder that you two aren’t alone. 

Hagen: *clears throat* Do you want kids?

Nikola: Yes.

Hagen: How many?

Nikola: Three

Hagen: Do you already have names picked out?

Nikola: Yes. But I am not sharing. Hagen knows them, though.

Hagen: Yes, I do. When do you think we will have kids?

Nikola: When we’re both ready and not a moment before. I have a spell over his womb and it is linked to our hearts and our minds. It will not happen until we’re both ready.

Tippy: You see, this is my problem with you, Nik. You keep raising the bar like it’s not already high enough as it is!!!!!

Hagen: And y’all wonder why I can’t get off of it…

Nikola: *tilts head* get off of what

Hagen: I’ll tell you later. Let’s wrap this up for now. Do you think your relationship would have been less intense if you were separated when you were little?

Nikola: No. I think it would have been the same, just in healthier ways. I think if we were separated, life would have continued on and when we met, it would have been catastrophic. I would not let him go or get out of him.

Hagen: *blushing* Nik, not every thought needs to be shared in full.

Nikola: Then what is the point of all this. *continues with no shame* I also think it may have been worst for Hagen. From what our parents say, he suffered then and if it continued, Goddess only knows what he would have gone through or suffered mentally.

Nikola: If there is a choice between him suffering or me, I will take the suffering every time.

Hagen: Nik…

Nikola: Is that not obvious?

Tippy: He is being truthful.

Hagen: *sniffs* Alright, let’s really get through this, cause I need some time alone with him. What’s your favourite weird talent of Hagen’s?

Nikola: He can feed himself with his feet. I hate it.

Hagen: But you just said it’s your favourite

Nikola: Yes. *frowns*  I hate that it enthrals me. 

Hagen: *cackling* Have you ever read/Do you read smut, and if so, what’s your favourite book/scene? I can answer this, Nikola reads a lot, but he doesn’t read—

Nikola: Used to. The Temptation Series by Ella Frank. Every scene.

Hagen: *jaw drops open*

Tippy: *jaw drops open*

Nikola: …I had a lot of time when I finished school. I learned.

Tippy: So that’s how you knew what to do with Hagen… that series is very detailed

Nikola: And very good.

Tippy: *nods in having the full audible series*

Hagen: Last question! Are you ready?

Nikola: Yes.

Hagen: When we broke up, did you stop fighting for your relationship because you ran out of strength, or because you ran out of love?

Nikola: *frowning* Why would you ask this last?

Hagen:  Because I already know the answer.

Nikola: *smiles softly* I ran out of strength, not love. I had been fighting for us for so long, in the right ways and the wrong ones, and I grew tired. But I never once, never could ever, fall out of love with Hagen. That is one of the constants of this universe, my love for him.

Hagen: *climbs over the table to kiss him and Nikola takes him in his lap*

Tippy: Awwwwwwwwww, aren’t they just the fucking cutest couple you’ve ever—

*they disappear, with the machine*

Tippy:… and the horniest. Well. That’s it, folks. I hope you enjoyed this year’s Q&A!

MERRY CHRISTMAS AND HAPPY HOLIDAYS