a/n – wrote the scenes in this chapter to Anthem Part Two by blink-182 and Rosyln by Bon Iver, St. Vincent

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Peter’s POV

I’m not going to cry.

There is literally no reason to. We’re still in the air with less than twenty minutes to go, and even if a bit of turbulence has decided to escort us the rest of the way, that’s still no excuse to meet my team for the first time with red eyes and a clogged nose.

So no, I’m not doing it. I am not crying.

The plane dips, and I barely stifle my scream as my heart drops along with it.

At least, not yet.

“Hanging in there, Peter?” Mateo calls over his shoulder.

“Y-Yup,” I reply, and somehow he hears it over the clanking.

I’m not sure what part of Julieta, Mateo’s ‘viejita’, is loose and rattling, but she’s been making that sound since we took off. I got used to it within the first ten minutes. Granted, it took some box breathing, but I did not freak out, and that was a plus in my book. But then five minutes ago, that rattling sped up, becoming as rapid as a hummingbird’s wings, and I haven’t let go of my seatbelt since.

Julieta drops again, and this time, my gasp fills the entire plane before she catches herself again.

“Normal winds before descent,” Mateo promises with a carefree chuckle. “We’re fine. Don’t worry. I promise- we’ll make it before the blades ice over.”

Before the what?

My eyes dart over to the tiny window above my head, but there are no propellers. What awaits are the fringes of the Southern Ocean and the beginning edges of the coldest continent on the planet. Antarctica.

For a moment, I just stare.

There are two colours alone- blue and white. They dominate this corner of the globe without mercy. Where the ocean breaks the perimeter, taking scattered icebergs out to sea, there are shades of blues more vibrant than any I’ve ever seen. They make the perfect backdrop to the pristine white that has claimed everything else, travelling so far and wide that I can’t even tell where the sky meets the horizon. They’re one and the same here.

“Everyone gets that look,” Mateo chuckles, but I barely hear him.

It’s like another planet.

My mind tries to tell me it is, that it can only be because it’s too different and beautiful to belong to this one, which is odd when Earth has consistently proved to me how beautiful she can be.

But even so, this is different. I’ve been all over the world, and every new place has left me awed and breathless, but this? Nothing compares to this.

My heart jumps, lungs filling as awe battles with fear, but I’m used enough to this feeling not to be scared of it. Every time I start a new expedition, it shows up-the rush of being so excited about something that you become terrified of it.

It’s a gift, and a reminder that I’m doing something crazy and brave, and that means that I’m growing somehow. As an omega, I’d learned to chase it.

It’s different this time though. This feels… I stare over the ice, my own heart now faster and louder than the rattling. Wild. Like I might vibrate out of my skin if I’m not careful.

Julieta dips slowly, beginning her descent, and I drag my eyes back inside.

The geologist on my first expedition told me that it was bad luck to look out a window during landing, and well, I don’t think I’ll ever let that one go.

I close my eyes instead, taking a deep breath as I focus my mind on the good, and there is a lot of good.

This was a new expedition, which meant another notch in the belt of my career. This was experiments I could only ever dream of, and access to data most researchers only dreamed of.

It was also a fresh start as far from home as I’d ever been, and I was doing it on my own.

Eight years ago, it had taken me an hour just to get out of the car so my parents could take me in to my university dorm. Now, I’m flying over Antarctica to start a three-month stint without them or anyone else holding my hand to get me there.

It was just Joseph and me– or would be once we touched down, and he felt safe enough to come out- but the point was, it was us doing this, and as my family loved to remind me, if I wasn’t the first werewolf to come down here, then I was likely the first omega to do it.

My fingers tighten around my seatbelt as a smile forms on my lips.
For once, it doesn’t shake.

──────────✧──────────

Usually, when I arrived in a new place, there was this moment to take it all in.

I would breathe in the fresh air, touch the grass or sand, and just let my body register all the unfamiliar things surrounding me. There was none of that, this time.

The minute Julieta stopped on the runway, it was Go! Go! Go!

In the same timeframe it took for me to get my seatbelt off, Mateo was up and out of his and working open the door. While he jumped in the back to prepare the supplies, a very serious gentleman stood in the doorway, waving at me to get out.

I’d barely grabbed my bag or said goodbye to Mateo before the new man was whisking me away. Setting into a jog, he had us running towards a massive red-and-white truck, like we were in the army, running drills.

Instincts told me to bolt and head the other way because I didn’t know him and he was very tall, but there was no time to be scared and nowhere to run when we were surrounded by endless, flat ice.

“We’re trying to beat the cold”, he shouted, and Goddess help me, it was cold.

I knew it would be, and I thought I prepared for it in all the ways I could, but I don’t think there is any number of layers or special-grade thermals that could spare a person from what -24°C felt like at the South Pole.

By the time I climbed up the outer ladder and made it into the truck, I was shaking from head-to-toe and wondering what in all the realms had possessed me to do this. But there was no time to consider climbing back into Mateo’s plane and asking him to take me back to Chile, because my nameless driver didn’t waste a second getting us going the second he was behind the wheel.

White dust clouds kick up around us as he continues down an invisible road, driving us to the short buildings in the distance that can only be the research station.

I peek around, avoiding looking directly at him. There’s room for at least ten in the back of the truck, but they all sit empty since I am the only one arriving today, as the last to join the team.

Which is just how things worked out – Joseph whispers as he risks rising from his hiding spot. I’m sorry. You know how I feel about flying.

It’s okay. I’m no better with it.

You are. If I were up front, we would have been carried out – he replies, making me stifle my giggle as I cup my hands in my lap.

“I’m John.”

I jerk, darting towards the door. I’d forgotten he was there.

Carefully lifting my gaze, I settle it first on the hand outstretched between us before I glance up at the man. He’s a big, burly man, the type I usually run away from, but he is smiling, and despite my hesitation, he keeps his hand raised between us while he glances between me and the road. Sucking in a breath, I force mine into it and jerk again as he gives it a rough squeeze.

“P-Peter,” I get out when he frees me, and his grin widens within his big black beard. It’s scruffy and untamed, but it matches his dark brown eyes that I quickly look away from.

“The marine biologist,” he surmises, and I nod quickly. “I’m a Driver.”

“Ah,” I whisper.

“Drivers” made up their own team of sorts outside of us researchers. They were the guides, the vehicle operators and station managers. The people who kept everyone alive while the researchers safely geeked out over all our data and experiments.

“Mateo is one too, though he covers supply runs to and from the warmer coasts- lucky bastard,” he laughs a little, glancing at me. “He will bring the rest of your things with the other supplies, but I thought it best to get you somewhere warm, stat.”

“T-T-Thanks,” I manage, and from the corner of my eye, I catch his smile wane a little. Joseph whines, and my insides shift uncomfortably. I shift, reaching for my hair, but I tied it back for the trip.

“Everyone is really excited to meet you,” he tries again when I say nothing else.

I nod and form a smile for him to see, so maybe he won’t think I’m rude.

I want to say more, like ‘thank you for coming to get me‘ and ‘is it always this cold? Or is today a warm day‘, but I don’t know him, and I’m still getting used to his scent. It’s strong for a human, and like the rest of him, it’s overwhelming.

Over the years, I’d gotten better at meeting new people. I didn’t cower so much anymore or try to hide behind one of my brothers, but that didn’t mean that I could do it without some prep.

I had this routine. First, I had to get used to the scent, and then, manage eye contact once or twice. Once I did those two things, I was usually okay to start talking to them. It wasn’t ideal, but it was what was working. This was harder because of how crazy our meeting was, but it would’ve been worse if he’d come with others.

Um, Peter – Joseph pipes up nervously. Didn’t he just say that everyone is excited to meet us?

I still. Heart dropping as my eyes dart up to John. Thankfully, he’s looking at the road instead of me. “Ev-Ev-Everyone?”

“Yeah,” he replies, his smile back in place now as he taps his fingers against the wheel. “We made sure we were all in to say hello.” He glances at me, and my dread must show on my face because he adds. “Everyone’s nice. We’re a close-knit team. You’ll see.”

My head nods dully while I shift my gaze forward, staring blindly into the distance.

Okay, before we panic, let’s look at the bright side – Joseph suggests as if he’s not already easing his way back into his nook.

The bright side? Okay. Well, a close-knit team was a great thing. That meant I could make friends and memories beyond just the research. It also meant that they’d have my back when I needed it.

But the bad side, or the dark side-

How about we don’t think about the bad side? – Joseph begs quietly. Let’s think of all the good possibilities.

Okay – I agree as I try to not to squeeze my fingers too tight.

The positives were good enough. There was no reason to think about how a tight-knit group meant there was a possibility that I might be excluded from it. Or how talking to a bunch of new people at once always made me freak out. Or what it would feel like, having all those eyes on me, expecting me to speak…

Oh Goddess.

It’s going to be okay – Joseph promises, though he’s fading and quick. I’ll be back. I just need to calm down, because if I don’t, then we’ll both freak, and that’s not good.

He fades before I can try clinging to him, and I bite my lip to stop myself from groaning.

Joseph didn’t usually disappear so much, but he’d warned me that it would be hard for him at the start, being so far from home and having no other wolves around to comfort us, so I couldn’t blame him.

I was the one who’d made the decision to take us all the way here, and day one, and I’m already panicking.

Squeezing my hands in my lap, I hold them tight so I can’t bury my face in my hands. John probably thought I was strange enough, he didn’t need more evidence of it.

Closing my eyes, I try to slow my breaths.

It was okay. I could do this.

I just had to stick to short answers, and if anyone asked about the stuttering, I could blame it on the cold today, and once I mustered the courage, I could tell them about my speed impediment.

That conversation was never my favourite. I actually hated it, almost as much as I hated the stuttering itself, but I’d learned how to get through it in order to get all the lovely things that came with people knowing. Like leeway, less judgment, more understanding and more patience. But the lead-up before it was always the worst, and I didn’t see myself having the strength to make that speech today.

So, short answers and smiles it is.

Goddess help me.

John and I arrive at our station not even five minutes later, but it’s enough time for me to have calmed myself down enough to have two sentences ready.

‘Hi, I’m Peter. It’s nice to meet you all’.

It won’t come out that smoothly, but it’s a start, and if everyone is nice, hopefully, it’ll be enough.

We dash out the truck just as quickly as we’d gotten in it, but the distance is thankfully a lot shorter this time. Ten steps and up three stairs, we’re dashing through a door that opens for us to spill inside.

I hold my breath, waiting for the confetti or scream of my name. It never comes. Just the firm shut of the door behind us before a woman I recognise steps forward.

“Peter! You made it!” Sandra greets, wearing a friendly smile and a whole lot less layers than we are.

I blow out a breath as relief crashes into me. After a lifetime spent with a crazy family, I prepared myself to meet everyone at the door with fireworks, but Papa’s madness remains sequestered in my mind as I smile at my field leader.

“Y-Yes,” I reply finally. “Julieta su-suh-succeeded.”

Sandra barks a laugh while John’s eyebrows disappear into his hairline. My heart clenches, and I quickly look away from them both.

I want to tell him sorry, but it wasn’t that I didn’t want to talk to him more on the way. It just took time. I’ve been talking to Sandra for weeks through email and phone calls to prepare for this, and even though it’s my first time seeing her in person, she’s familiar enough for me to get more than one word out.

She’d also warned me about Julieta and how I had to believe in her if I wanted a smooth landing.

“I’m glad,” she replies before she gestures to the wall already covered in gear. “I’ll give you the tour and then take you to meet the others, but I suggest you strip before you pass out. It’s happened before.”

My heart flip-flops, but I put my nerves to work as I quickly waddle over to the empty hooks where John is already removing his layers.

“We keep it a nice eighteen in here so you don’t have to worry about frostbite,” Sandra says while I tug at my outercoat’s zipper. It takes a few tries before it gives and slides down. “And since you’re here in the summer, I don’t think you’ll be needing too much of the murals.”

I glance around while I shrug out of my coat. The walls are painted with all sorts of landscapes-from meadows to sand dunes, woodlands, and a sunny beach. According to my last field leader, who thought I was crazy to take up this post, they were here to keep people sane during the winter months.

“If you’re a painter, you have permission to make a new one,” John says beside me. I shake my head, and he fakes a sigh. “I guess we’re stuck with Jenny’s attempts!” I jolt at the sudden shout, but luckily, John misses it as he holds his breath, waiting for-

“I heard that!” A voice calls from somewhere down the attached hall, and John snickers.

“Stop it, John,” Sandra scolds in a tone that’s familiar, “we don’t want to scare Peter off on day one.”

He nods, mumbling a ‘sorry’ for me while Sandra shakes her head. I glance between them and the knot in my chest soon eases, freeing some of the holding me tight. This is familiar-the teasing and the bickering, and I know a whole lot about bickering, even if I don’t take part in it.

“That there was Meng Xinyi- Jenny. Our atmospheric scientist and resident psychologist,” Sandra explains as I make it down to my second half.

I bend for my boots, almost falling on my ass, until Sandra catches me and stoops down instead. She starts on my laces with a wink, and I reach again for my hair as heat floods my face, but it’s still tied back.

“The paintings,” John explains when I don’t reply. “That one of the beach got me through January.”

“And yet you mock my skills.”

I glance up, spotting who can only be Xinyi. She’s a short woman dressed in all black, with short, cropped hair, and she’s resilient. How do I know? Because she’s got at least ten piercings on both ears, two in her nose, one in her lip, and with how cold it is out there, that means she puts them back in every time she steps through the door.

“Jenny,” she introduces as she waves at me. “No handshake from me, sorry. I’m a germaphobe.” My brows meet even though I’m grateful to be spared, and she immediately spots it. “I know, what’s a germaphobe doing in the icebox for bacteria. Passion outweighed sense.”

I giggle before I can stop it. I understood that because the very last place an omega werewolf probably should be is here, but passion.

“Alright, you’re free,” Sandra says, and I mumble a thank you before I quickly shove the boots off and shed the last of my bottom layers. “As you know, there are five of us Researchers and many more Drivers like our sweet John here.”

“Don’t butter me up unless you’ve got scones, Sandra,” John says while he passes me by, already down to his thermals. He heads where Jenny came from, shoving a hand towards her as he goes and snickering wickedly when she jumps away.

“We all get along, but that doesn’t mean we don’t annoy each other,” Sandra says as she watches them go. “But if anyone takes it too far with you, you let me know, alright?”

I nod while I hook up the last of my layers. When I turn, she’s waiting with an indoor shoe in hand. I take them gratefully, almost sobbing at the fur waiting on the inside.

“And, Peter.”

I still, heart dropping automatically.

I haven’t looked her in the eye yet- haven’t looked any of them in the eye really, just at the space between their brows or at their nose- but her tone compels me to find hers for a brief moment.

They’re pretty. A bright auburn that lives within her freckled face. They’re dotted all over, and I watch some stretch as she steps closer to offer me a small smile.

“I told the Researchers about your speech impediment, since we’ll be with them the most. I hope that was not an overstep. I just didn’t want you feeling overwhelmed on your first day.”

She holds her breath as she stares at me. She doesn’t blink, as if she’s waiting for me to get upset while I struggle not to be the one to overstep by hugging her.

“Thank you,” I whisper, and it comes without effort or strain as my chest warms. “Thank you, s-so much.”

Sandra nods, her smile growing before she steps forward, silently prompting me to follow.

The inside of our small station is like a maze, kind of like what I imagine spacecrafts to look like, which I guess makes sense since we’re essentially distant cousins down here. But it’s nice, with Jenny’s murals on just about every wall.

There are the dorms, which are even smaller than the one Shilao and I shared in university, but at least just for one this time around. There’s an equipment room meant for the Drivers and another for us, a small kitchen, and more, but we spill into what must be the social area mid-way, and that’s where everyone is.

It’s like walking into the cafeteria in high school, or my living room home when everyone is visiting with their mates and kids, but I don’t know anyone here, and none of them knows my triggers, so there’s nothing to stop them all from looking to me at once. And that’s exactly what they do.

It takes everything within me not to fall to my knees.

Cold sweat runs down my spine, and all the comfort Sandra has stirred within me disappears as though it was never there at all.

“Everyone,” Sandra says, voice loud enough to carry, “this is Peter. The marine biologist we were lucky enough to snatch up for our team.”

I squeeze my hands in front of me, strangling them while Joseph and I cling to one another for the strength we barely have.

There are about ten of them, which really isn’t that much, but it feels like an entire crowd. My heart races, threatening to give, and as I try like all hell to muster up the words I practised on the way over, but Sandra already stole half of them.

‘Hi. It’s nice to meet you all.

It’s just a few words. Two sentences. I say it, and then, I’m free.

I lift a shaky hand and manage a squeak.

I also die a little inside.

“Well, this is awkward.”

Eyes drag away from me as groans fill the room, and everyone starts berating whoever said that. It’s a guy who disappears as two others stretch over from their seats to slap him while shouting apologies at me on his behalf.

The general buzz of chatter that had filled the room before returns with a vengeance as the nearest person to me jumps up to introduce themselves. They trickle in one at a time after that, each coming to say hi without much expectation for me to say any more back, with all the noise around us.

It’s literal madness. The noise, the chaos. And I love every second of it, because it’s home, or as close to it as I’ll be for three months, and it’s perfect.

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AHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!! GROWN UP PETER IS IN ANTARCTICA!!!!!!!!!!!

ThoughtS????????

THoughts on the first chapter??? On Peter’s POV after all these years????? On his internal thoughts????

I want to hear everything!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

It was surprisingly hard as hell writing this chapter lmfaoo, even though I knew what was going to happen. It was getting it in his voice, which did not come as quickly as usual, but I like a challenge so we’ll see where Peter takes me.

Next chapter and POV is Luciel! And that chapter will either be out tomorrow or on Monday! But a sneak peek is already up for the Gold Tier on Patreon and my website!!!!!

Remember to vote if you enjoyed this chapter and comment too!!!

I hope yall are as excited for this journey as I am!!!!!!

Until next time,
Byeeeeeeeeeeeeee Humanssssssssssssss